Three Things: Champagne Jerry, Subway Rides and Realness

 (Michelle Lawlor)

What. No, seriously. What? Champagne Jerry in Brooklyn Bridge Park

 

What’s it like to spend the day with Champagne Jerry – the world’s greatest rapper – while he’s shooting a music video for his single “Three Things“?

Well, since you asked so nice, I’ll tell you.

First thing you need to know is that it’s about keeping a low profile to avoid the media and the rabid female fans.

Ladies, Champagne Jerry is a desired man. 

Multitalented and surrounded by only the finest in exceptional professionals, he’s the real deal. Who else rolls through all five boroughs of New York City in one day toting a rolling pink suitcase full of champagne?

CJ, that’s who.

Your man CJ rapped his ass off in each borough on a fine sunny September day. I had the distinct pleasure to ride along as personal paparazzi to document this one-of-a-kind artist as he put ink to his paper in the history books.

Here are the pics – and be sure to scroll ALL THE WAY DOWN for a link to the GALLERY and MORE INFO ABOUT CJ’s RECORD.

DO IT.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

SI-bound. The view from our reserved deck on the “private yacht.” That’s right. We ballin.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Excuse me, celebrities and exceptional rappers only on the poopdeck, please.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

The cap’n and his skipper affix the ship’s name plate. Almost there…

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

All aboard the SS Realness featuring your captains CJ and Max Tannone

 (Michelle Lawlor)

There ain’t a lens wide enough to get all that realness…

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Off the yacht and into Staten Island. Follow that hot bag, yo.

 

Once the “yacht” docked, we headed to the courthouse so CJ could rap on the steps to show you all how legit for real he is.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Legal, y’all.

 

Next, we headed back toward the yacht to get a dockside view.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Sometimes when you get up at the break of dawn you get mesmerized by your coffee…

 (Michelle Lawlor)

 (Michelle Lawlor)

“‘Scuse me, real important text message happening right now. Thanks.”

 

Second thing you need to know is that there’s lots of travel involved in the music business.

We headed back to the subway for the first of many LONG rides through the city, this time heading toward Brooklyn. I love what people write on the subway walls.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Just the one, please. Kthanxbi.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Now in Brooklyn, CJ takes a moment to prepare. Or text. Whatevs.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Some behind-the-scenes… Max Tannone working the main cam, with Casey Bartolucci grabbing some highlander duster angles.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

More behind-the-scenes: Kathleen Fox rockin the shots.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Here we gooooooooo!

 (Michelle Lawlor)

 (Michelle Lawlor)

“If you rap for them, they will come.” All Champagne Jerry’s kids rolled up and wanted to party. Notice he’s ready to hit the road. Babymamas can’t be too far behind…

 

Third thing you need to know is that there’s lots of travel in the music business.

Oh, wait, I said that already.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Follow the pink-pantied ass to the subway again. And you know, ride safe.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

We found the Ghost of Champagne Past on the subway ride to Manhattan. And no, she’s not smiling, you’re just wasted. Have some more champagne.

Once we found our way to Manhattan, CJ and crew set up to perform. About 1 minute into the song, some of the folks who were sleeping stage left were awakened by our ruckus.

With all of the cameras present, it’s amazing that none of us captured the outburst when the smelly gentleman jumped up and yelled “F@CK YOU FOREVERRRRRRRRR!” before storming off.

Critics. Who needs ’em.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Rapping on 42nd street, waking up homeless dudes.

 

On our way back to the subway, the Ghost of Champagne Past ran into an old flame.

Awkwardddddd…

 (Michelle Lawlor)

You can’t keep showing up like this, Justin. 

 

We had to make a pretty quick exit from the JT awkwardness, so we again followed the bag of bubbly back to the subway.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

BRONX BOUND.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Setting up on the side of the Bronx River Parkway. Renegade.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

 (Michelle Lawlor)

We have a ghost down. Repeat, a ghost is DOWN.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

The obligatory pre-longest-subway-ride-ever group photo.

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

Following the bag to our final stop. QUEENS.

 (Michelle Lawlor)

 

 (Michelle Lawlor)

 (Michelle Lawlor)

“It’s a wrap, you guys.”

 (Michelle Lawlor)

After hours of traveling, dodging awkward celebrity and homeless guy encounters, the last crew shot.

Here’s the final video:

FOR MORE PHOTOS CLICK HERE!

CJ’s debut album For Real, You Guys is produced by master beatmaker Max Tannone, with additional beats contributed by the ever-prolific Beastie Boy Adam “AdRock” Horovitz and Carmine Covelli. To further tickle your giblets, the record also features vocal performances by AdRock, Kathleen Hanna (The Julie Ruin/Bikini Kill/Le Tigre), and the amazing potty-mouthed alt-cabaret phenomenon Bridget Everett (look this woman UP if you don’t know!!).

About For Real, You Guys, per CJ’s official website:

“It is the kind of album where every song is a hit. The kind of listening experience that changes people forever. The kind of music that makes the whole world a better place. […] The album is about having sex with people in your office. It is about driving a Chevette. It is about the States of Texas AND Florida. It is about realness, hip hop, and champagne.”

It’s silly, it’s filthy, it’s funky, the beats will make you dance effortlessly, and I frigging love it. Check it out.

For Real, You Guys is currently being released a song at a time, with a new song/video debuting once a month through 2013-2014, with LIVE GIGS at Joe’s Pub scheduled through January. If you’re in town THIS WEEKEND, go see CJ at Joe’s Pub THIS SATURDAY, 12/7/13 for the premiere of YO KEV! DO IT!!!

Follow CJ on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, or with your EYEBALLS and go see him live.

Do it.

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